Sorry there was no post yesterday. I got in late and went straight to bed. ANYWHO! I am happy to say I am a blogger today. Yesterday took a bad turn, but those wonderful friends of mine made it all better. It’s my own fault I haven’t been happy this week. All week my friends have been there for me and trying to cheer me up and I’ve just been crying. This is the first day I’ve gone without crying. It feels quite nice. What made it so hard for me to smile was the fact that I’m just so angry with myself. I set my goals for myself so high and I just hate that I haven’t reached them yet. I hate asking for help but right now I have to.
But things are looking up. At least I am anyway. Instead of just spending the day pouting I’m just going to sleep. JUST KIDDING. I’m just going to try to find happiness in everything. Even if it seems impossible. There’s beauty in everything and everyone. I’ve been neglecting that and that’s probably why I’ve just been so moody. That and its human nature. I shouldn’t let it affect my whole day though. I just need to remember to take everything one step at a time. I keep trying to tackle the world and its problems. I need to take care of myself, because I have a long way to go before I’m honestly okay again.
Also, the boyfriend and I worked things out. That’s a huge part of why I’m in such a good mood. I know we’re bound to fight but that doesn’t make it any easier when we do. As long as I don’t lose him all together I’m fine with fighting I guess. This is the first relationship I’ve had that I actually have faith in. He’s the first good boyfriend I’ve ever had so that’s part of the reason I’m so difficult. He says things and he means them but it’s just hard for me to trust him. Thank God for his patience. I honestly don’t think I deserve him but I’m very happy he thinks very differently.
This is my post for the day because I won’t be home tonight. I have to stay at my grandmother’s and make sure that her and my sister don’t get in too big of an argument. Fun, I know. Sorry this is so badly written but my thoughts are all jumbled so I tend to type all jumbled. I’ll get better I promise. Things are turning around my friends. One day at a time.