Why is bleeding so much easier than talking? I’m sorry. Let me start this again. Hey guys. Why is bleeding so much easier than talking? Moments like these just make me want to give up. I need new glasses. This has been an obvious fact for I don’t know how long. Now I found a way to get some and my mother is pissed at me. She’s mad because of the way I asked her. Maybe I was a bitch about it, but if you had been asking for new glasses for the past two years you’d be a bitch too. Yeah, I know it still isn’t right but I’m just fed up. Whenever they need something they make time for it. When I need something there’s no time for it. Now that they need new glasses too there’s time to get new ones. Are you fucking kidding me?
If I go out by myself to get something I get yelled at for not going with them. I’m nineteen years old so I shouldn’t have to ask everytime I go out somewhere. I have no life so I’m not going to any parties, my boyfriend is all the way in Florida so I’m not going to have sex with anyone, and I have no interest in drugs. They know all of this and still don’t trust me. I can’t win and it pisses me off. So when I went up there for the glasses I said: “You know how I’ve been asking for new glasses for the past two years and we haven’t gotten them?” and she flipped her damn lid.
Well, excuse me while I sit here and don’t feel bad. I’m sick of having to take the back seat to everyone and everything. So whatever. Anyway. Today was a good day (besides that little incident). I hung out with my sister and we watched movies and had fun. I didn’t leave the house but there’s always tomorrow for that. Plus, there was Danny (boyfriend). He makes me laugh when I think it’s impossible. Today he was amazing and I’m really happy that he loves me. He was just there for me. I had a mini melt down last night and text him while he was asleep and today he spent it just trying to make me laugh and smile.
I’m keeping my fingers crossed that tomorrow will be better. I’m just going to ignore everyone. Including my parents. That’s rude and whatever but I don’t feel like arguing so unless they actually need me not a word will spoken. Trust me I am looking into moving somewhere else. I love them but this isn’t working anymore. I’m just tired of it. Things will get better though. In time everything gets better. I just have to smile and figure out a way to make everything better.